- Horse race announcer: (commenting on the race and results)
Anouncer: It's a dead heat! They're checking the electron microscope. And the winner is... Number three in a quantum finnish!
Professor Farnsworth: No fair! You changed the outcome by measuring it!
- Hermes (buying drinks): I'll have a horse Coke.
- Vendor: Horse Pepsi okay?
- Hermes: Nay.
- Bender: (Making horses go to sleep with drugs.)
- Driver: "Hey, what are you doing?!"
- Bender:"This." (Shoots him with some drugs and he falls asleep.)
- Leela: "Well, someone's in a good mode."
- Bender: "Let's just say I lucked out at the track. Also, I rigged one race."
- Fry: "He stole my name, he stole my clover and he stole my life!" (Punches a statue of Philip J. Fry) "And now he broke my hand!"
- Bender: "His legend lives on!"