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- "The Amazonians will be divided into three groups. The one called Zapp will be snu-snued by the large women. He that is designated Fry will be snu-snued by the petite women. And Kif, as the most attractive male, will be snu-snued by the most beautiful women of Amazonia... then the large women, then the petite women, then the large women again."
- ―Femputer, declaring how Zapp, Fry and Kiff will be snu-snued.
Amazon Women in the Mood is the fifth episode in Season Three of Futurama. It was first aired on February 4, 2001.
Storyline
Amy Wong has been receiving phone calls consisting only of panting and gasping since last year. The calls are from Kif Kroker, who is consumed by love for Amy, but finds himself unable to speak to her due to his nervousness and shyness. Zapp Brannigan offers to talk to him about it, but he just laughs at Kif and ignores him. But when he realizes that Amy and Leela know each other, he decides to go on a double date: Kif with Amy and Zapp with Leela. Leela only agrees to the date as a favor to Amy and the four go to a fashionable restaurant on board a space liner, but Leela classifies it to be a "half-date".
Kif tries to greet Amy with flowers and candy, but Zapp tells him giving flowers is wrong and that candy is for dorks (but he ends up cramming down the chocolate and gives the flowers to Leela, who immediately burns them in the candle and stuff them in his drink). Kif takes Zapp's advice about seducing women by handing him his notebook of lines that "he should use as much as you can, fast as you can", but he discovers are idiotic, such as "the most erotic part about a woman is the boobies." Before Kif could apologize, Amy storms off. Forlorn, Kif gets onstage to participate in karaoke and sing a heartfelt rendition of Bonnie Tyler's 1983 hit song "Total Eclipse of the Heart". The gesture touches Amy, but Zapp quickly hijacks the stage to end his "amateur hour" and launches into a performance of "Lola", substituting "Leela" for the eponymous love interest of the original song, that disgusts the other passengers, so much they flee the ship in terror. Zapp insists he can steer the restaurant-ship home instead of taking a taxi, but proceeds to crash it into planet Amazonia.
The four are unharmed, but are heard by the Amazonians, a race of tall, muscular, tribal women. They are about to walk away, but Zapp blows the group's cover by trying to seduce them, also with his notebook, resulting all of them being captured
The Femputer
After hearing about the crash, Fry and Bender take off in the Planet Express Ship to find Leela and Amy. They make their way to the Amazonian's city and are also captured. The Amazonians decide to take the men to their leader, the Femputer, a man-hating, wall-sized computer to determine their fate. Along the way, Fry, Zapp, and Bender offend the Amazonians for their inability to dunk in basketball, their usage of intellect and character in the comedy club, and asking if the Femputer was actually hot (one Amazonian responds saying it doesn't matter, and Fry says she probably isn't, resulting a kick in the face).
The male characters discover the last men died out on Amazonia shortly after the Femputer appeared, and that invasive males were killed by "snu-snu", which is Amazonian for sex. Fry, Zapp, Kif, and Bender are then chained to be with the Femputer sentencing them to death. When they are told they died of crushed pelvises, this results in mixed feelings of horror and delight from both Fry and Zapp, but merely horror from Kif (whom Zapp then falsely accuses of being gay). Bender is released and is spared from being raped, as he is not technically a man but a man-bot and therefore cannot be punished by snu-snu. Fry, Zapp, and Kif are left, and are taken to the snu-snu chambers and stripped to their underpants and then raped by multiple Amazon women. Kif tells Amy that Zapp gave him the lecherous pick-up lines and that he was the one who kept calling Amy and not speaking and declared he loves her before being taken away.
The Femputer's real face
Amy is touched by Kif's words, and Leela sends Bender to unwillingly reprogram the Femputer. Although Bender initially refuses, a few angry words of Cantonese and a twisted arm from Amy changes his mind. He sneaks into the Femputer's chamber and attempts to reprogram it by beating it with a wrench. To his surprise he finds that the Femputer is actually a computer operated by a fembot, who came from a world ruled by a vicious Manputer who was actually a manbot. She then advances on him, wondering what to do with him.
By this point, Fry and even Zapp are exhausted and protesting at their snu-snu raping punishment before being dragged back in the chambers by the Amazonian's. Amy and Leela try to rescue the men, but when Leela tries to use violence, she is simply pulled up from her hair then sat on. Amy sneaks into Kif's snu-snu chamber on a pair of stilts, in order to pass as an Amazonian. Kif is on the ceiling trying to avoid being raped by the Amazonian leader and comes over to Amy. She grabs Kif and flees with him in her arms, but the Amazonians chase them back to the Femputer's chamber. Bender is inside, making out with the fembot. Two voices come from the Femputer, which confuses the Amazonians. After a short while, the Fembot and Bender convince the Amazonians to release all their captives (and for Bender, that they would bring gold). Back on Earth, Fry and Zapp receive treatment for their severe pelvic injuries from the multiple rapes they received from the Amazonians. After Fry and Zapp comment about their experience, which they concur with Bender as "the best mission ever", Kif asks Amy what the two could do next. Amy whispers something to Kif and the episode fades out with Amy smiling while Kif nervously, breathes heavily.
Ongoing Themes
Hermes and Zoidberg
Hermes suggests that everyone should take his fair share in the effort of cleaning up Nibbler's hairballs, but then he assigns the task to Zoidberg alone. This is not necessarily unusual hostility from Hermes; Zoidberg is definitely the omega dog. Hermes later refers to Zoidberg as a "fat fish". But again, this is not necessarily unusual; Hermes is very protective of the Planet Express budget and might have been reacting to the possibility of Zoidberg buying an expensive new exoskeleton. Finally, near the end of the episode, Hermes explodes at Zoidberg for no particular reason, referring to him as a "windy barnacle", showing unambiguously that he has some serious issues with Zoidberg.
Death, near-death, mutilation
At the Planet Express staff meeting, Zoidberg's lifeless exoskeleton is sitting in Zoidberg's place. The other staff members believe it to be Zoidberg himself, concluding that Zoidberg is dead.
Fry and Leela
Fry has sex with an indeterminate number of Amazonian women with no sign of any jealousy from Leela or guilt from Fry.